Mercury is currently station retrograding in my 4th house (past reflections here). Conjunct Uranus, expect, as I mentioned previously, increased volatility in thought and deed, as well as some radical problem-solving.

The 4th house, apart from being about where one is at home, is also (together with the 10th house) part of the axis of parents. My relationship with my parents have always been fraught with ambivalence, and a bewildering mix of love, pain, struggle and fear.

There was a heated exchange this past weekend (Mercury in fiery Aries) and an epiphany (Uranus) this morning — new information from the past was revealed and a piece of the puzzle fell into place. Something clicked. And I woke up to the fact that their pathology wasn’t mine. I wasn’t responsible for their neurosis and never have been. A sense of relief. And liberation. I give myself permission to be me.

It’s funny how you can ‘know’ this in your head, but knowing it in your heart is what makes it real.

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